Hola, Quanto es uno litro mantequilla porfavor?

I have a little confession to make.. You know how we all make mistakes right?.. Well, last weekend I did something that I'm not too proud of.. I'm not sure if it was the drugs, or the lack of breathable air in that mall, or some combination of the above, but I would like to make it clear that I was NOT in a normal, healthy state of mind. With that established, I am hoping that this confession will help to save others from the pain and horror that I have had to endure. I went and saw 'The Mexican' with Julia Roberts and Brad Pitt. It was horrific. Neither the 'matinee pricing', the comfy seats nor the toasty 'buttered' popcorn did anything to alieviate the pain.

At some point (I imagine near the middle) I dozed off, but I caught enough of it to give you a general impression: 'Brad' (I think his charactors name was 'Jerry') is a mob underling that due to some wacky twist of fate (tm) owes a favour to his mob boss, who is currently in jail, due to 'Jerrys' blundering. Uh, hmm.. would you hire somebody whos blundering had landed you in jail? OK, anyhow, Jerry must go get an antique gun from mexico, where film crews come cheap, and you can just give the budget to the two main actors, cause thats who's gonna get the drug-addled mall walkers into the show in the first place - dig?

I don't know if I can go on with this, I'm trying to type the name 'Julia Roberts' and I keep getting muscle spasms of repulsion that send my fingers skittering across the keyboard.. Enough to say that the film would have been MUCh more bearable had 'Brad' and 'Julia' killed each in a double suicide other at the beginning, and for the rest of the movie the camera stayed pointed at a dusty storm grate with a high-pitched squealing sound for the soundtrack.

So to summarize: I hated this movie, and simply wish to help you avoid a very uncomfortable and tedious loss of two hours of your life. Just say NO kids! I'm going to go do my penence now.. About 30 hours in front of the TV watching old episodes of Entertainment Tonight with John Tesh and Liza Gibbons ought to keep me from EVER doing anything like this again.

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